B3 - Blessed Beyond Belief

Simply the BEST! 

It is Father's Day. These Hallmark moments seem to be the most difficult of all. I've always thought that you should show people daily how much you care about them and not save it up for once a year Hallmark moments.  

Now I think that the emotion only one time a year might be less exhausting. It is another one of those wave moments. Major wave. 

Today I am thinking about our little girls. Oh, they are not so little anymore, but to a mom and dad, they are always little girls. I know they miss their daddy today, more than on most days. It's that Hallmark moment thing, I'm sure. I'm just as sure though, that he knew every moment of every day how much he was loved by them. And they by him.  He might have worked 24 hour shifts, but he was home with them more than most dads we knew who worked a 9-5 job with all kinds of meetings at church. 

These three had fun fun times together. He taught them how to appreciate the simple things in life. He taught them how to love each other and watch out for each other and take care of each other. He was a daddy to girls, for sure. I am not quite sure what he would have done with a boy. His quiver was full with these two! 

I remember when I told him that we were going to have a baby. Roger had just turned 32 and I was almost 23. Back in the day you did not find out so early, nor have sonograms, nor know what in the world you were having, except that it would be a human baby.
I surprised him with a nice dinner at a fancy French restaurant. While we were waiting for our dinner and just chatting, I surprised him with the wonderful but a little bit terrifying news. I was 23 and clueless about what was about to happen to my life!  I think he was speechless, happy, but speechless. He hardly even touched his fancy meal and left a really really big tip on the table as we left. I was too young to know what was really going on in his head. Maybe he never thought about being a dad. Maybe he was excited that this was a reality. We had to go back to the apartment to call our parents...because back in the day, phones did not come with us.  It was a pretty exciting time in our lives. To say I was pampered would be putting it lightly. August 7 came and went with no baby. I was a baby beluga and floated in the swimming pool as often as possible. Finally, after being well more than over-due, the doctor had plans to 'get that baby.' We bought food for the shift and took it to Ralph Abel, had a walk around 'The Senator' at Big Tree Park, and put the bag in the car before we settled in for the night. Surprise of all surprises though, God was going to beat that doctor to the delivery table and we headed off to the hospital. I found out on that trip that Roger knew every brick road from Casselberry to Downtown Orlando - and he took each one of them! It is a wonder our new little baby was not dizzy by the time she arrived! And it was a quick delivery, he had planned ahead because the x-ray (seriously! Not even ultrasound was around yet!) had said that this was a 'big-un.'  True to form at 12:16 AM on August 27, our 10 lb. 0 oz. baby girl had arrived.  I can still hear Dr. Startzman say 'It's a girl!" before I drifted back into my little baby coma.  Things were different back then, but I remember being elated that we had a baby girl!  She was a joy from day one, and never has changed! She had him wrapped around her little pink finger from the very start too!  I think one of the happiest days in his life was when she moved back to town. Thank you Jim, for that move! 

By the time baby girl #2 arrived, we were settled in at PHCA and rolling along with all of the things that 4 year olds do to keep them busy and learning. Roger always thought that being an 'only child' was just about perfect, so he was quite content. I call Karin our little miracle because she was all about God's timing. 
Since Kristin had a hard time with the concept of actually sleeping for 8 hours straight, I was not at all sure that I was up to another round of wakefulness and I asked God for a baby that would sleep. He granted that request beautifully and she got the Underwood sleep gene, as opposed to the Wilamoski non-sleep gene.  (Papa - a Tome - could sleep but Nani, not so much) 
Karin was such a fun roly-poly baby and to listen to Nani, she was so much like Roger as a baby. Imagine that, Kristin like me, Karin like Roger. Go figure! 
You always wonder how you could possibly have enough love to stretch around to another sibling, but Roger sure did. Karin had him wrapped around her little finger too! And that never really ended. 

Roger was one great daddy and nothing made me happier than to watch him with our girls. 

Today, between the tears of missing him, I am trying to focus on the little things that made life what it was.  We had crazy good times. Not lavish, not eccentric, not over the top, but we enjoyed being together as a family. 

 I realize that above all I am particularly blessed that we live close together and we don't drive each other too crazy too much of the time. I realize how much Roger led us, even when we often thought that he was too much in a hurry.  Now I think he was in a hurry because there was so much he still wanted us to learn. I hope that I can stay aware to those teachings. 

Roger's Lesson: Oh I know that he would say about Father's Day - "Don't get me anything"  or "Let's go (insert anywhere), I got this!"

Now we finally realize that it was not being nice, it was because he really had no need for earthly goods.  And because he was generous, but also because he wanted us to save for a rainy day. 

We were do different in so many ways, and yet, now I see more than ever, that God put us together to balance us out. It is funny that what sometimes irritates us, really is God showing us where we need to balance it out.  I'd like some little irritations today. 

All in all though, for a Father's Day without a dad, it is really different. I'm so thankful for Jim, who is an unbelievably great dad, and for the blessings of our girls who are who they are because of Roger.  Blessed Beyond Belief. I will focus on that thought for the rest of this day!