A lot has happened in a month.
No matter how old you are - there is still more to learn. Wow - we have discovered that for sure!
We are overwhelmingly blessed in the ways that God has revealed Himself and the ways in which He has already walked before us in this new journey. A journey that began when we were still trying to complete the last big journey.
These things I know for sure....
* I never meant for this blog to be about me. In ways, it still isn't, but the focus seems that way at the moment. I hope it does not stay that way.
* I know more about bones than I ever thought would be necessary in a lifetime. Those things take care of themselves, right? Not!
* I never knew that breast cancer 18 years ago could resurface as bone cancer. Go figure.
* I never knew that bone cancer could feel like arthritis and not have any other definable symptoms.
* God protected these old bones in so many ways, long before I ever knew they needed protecting. Now it is my turn to be careful and bubble wrap myself for a bit.
* God protected me from knowing about all of this all year (2014), because I likely was not strong enough to have handled it. I am trusting that the lessons of this past year, mostly through what He has revealed through these blogs, will continue to provide the strength that is needed.
* Roger may not be here physically to carry me through like he did 18 years ago, but he certainly is still with me in many ways.
* Two of the ways he is with me are through his precious baby girls. I have a very blessed life.
* If you live your earthly life right, then you live in in different ways while you are actually enjoying the blessings of eternity. I want that too!
* If bone cancer is not curable, it certainly can be manageable in the days in which we live. I thank God for researchers and doctors who care enough to keep fighting it.
* Though I don't view myself as much of a fighter, a lot of other people seem to. I'm not quite sure what that says for the life I have lived, but I am choosing to trust others on this.
* I will strive not to complain, but rather to be thankful that when doctors in 1997 said they 'gave me' 2-5 years, God chose to give me 18. I just hope I used them wisely for His glory.
* My family and friends are the very best for me. I can not thank God enough for the people who crossed my path, simply because He allowed it. I hope that I am as good for them as they are for me.
* I am forever amazed at the natural curiosity of my son-in-love and the way he, Kristin, and Karin have once again stepped in to just organize and simplify things. I as sooooo trying to be compliant and allowing their work not to be wasted!
* The health professionals that have come into our lives in this past month are nothing short of appointments set by God. I just don't even have the words to explain.
The little white pill is designed to starve the cancer cells. I can already feel the 'tumor flare' where they are having a temper tantrum and self imploding. I will take that pain. It means that things are working!
The IV Infusion is the same stuff that makes the bones in little children have their growth spurts. If a child of yours ever screams at night or says their bones hurt and then you notice that they got taller.....trust me - they were not lying! It hurts to grow bones! I visualize these little DIY plaster artisans grabbing calcium out of my blood - it hurts when it pops through that blood vessel - and slapping it on the bone and smashing it in. Yes, that hurts too. But it is good hurt.
My bones are not exactly dry right now - thank goodness for that - but they do have some parts that are mighty hole-y. (not to be confused with Holy) But God can fix all of that and I am believing that with the prayers of many, my desire to fulfill His purposes and my promise to eat right, do right, rest right - do what I am told - that He will honor that desire of mine.
And radiation - Of all things, it does not hurt at all - other than lying on that cold, hard, metal table.
I have spots on both hips, left shoulder, left mid rib, and spine - (All of the T vertebrae) -
I know....how in the world am I not in excruciating pain? That's what the doctors say!
Grace of God - pure and simple - Grace of God.
So as of today, I am ⅓ of the way into radiation and only God knows how long the journey will be.
Am I up for it? Day by day, step by step, I hope so.
I don't want to take others down with me, so I am determined to be cheerful and thankful for each and every day God gives me. I will do what I can for myself and others, but I have no doubt that I will draw ever closer to Him.
Roger's Lesson: Actually Sweetie, that is what it is all about. Ever closer to Him. It is a decision you will never regret.
Dem Dry Bones
I love the history of this Spiritual.
A little music
A fun little kids video. Ezekiel didn't talk so much about noisy bones, but rather about hearing the Word of the Lord.
This might have been a prophecy about Israel, but I am also claiming it for my old bones. I'm trusting God to bring them back to life and allow them to show others how to have real life. Real life and real living - for all of eternity. But just in case I am not around for the long term - I sure hope you get it now!
Thanks, friends, near and far - and even those I do not know, for praying specifically.
* Good response to treatment
* That I do not break anything
* That I can be a blessing as others are such blessings to me.
* That I tough it out until I have fulfilled God's purposes for my earthly journey.
February 9 - God has carried us through this very tough year - and He has shown Himself to be every bit of the true and Living God that I have always known Him to be. This year it was experienced in very different ways. I miss Roger so much, but he will never be forgotten. That much I know for sure!
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